Category Archives: Adventures in the Intertubes

Ya’ll are weird – Exhibit A

Made the mistake of looking at the top search hits again. OK, the hot guy in the shower, I get it. But what possible use could anyone have for Biggie Smalls’ birth certificate?

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Filed under Adventures in the Intertubes, Lazy Latte Sipping Islahomo

What’s worse than a mass of TalEvangical TeaBaghist Douchenozzles?

How about a herd of fashion model equine mutant things:

Playmates, Inc., the manufacturer of the “Struts Fantasy Fashion Model Horse Runway Magic” is under the impression it “Combines a little girl’s love for horses with her love for fashion dolls.”

I know this makes me sound a bit of a sexist, but once again I’m forced to make the following observation: Men – If you need proof women are inherently less aggressive and just plain nicer, look no further than the fact we aren’t all messily dead or locked up in breeder camps. Women – Think I’m full of shit? Check yourselves for large bloodstains and a penis or two at the bottom of your purses.

See?

And I don’t CARE if Playmates, Inc. conducted focus groups with a million little girls. If they can’t tell when kids are fucking with them they need to go into another line of business.

Plus, note to toy makers: Try to create toys with names your target age group can memorize and say.

But every attempt to keep women so confused about their body image they don’t have time to round us up and shoot us dead has a silver lining:

I have collected horse toys and figurines all my life and I can promptly say that I feel no shame in adding this to my collection.

Despite the overtoned sexual themes of the toy, I think it is beautiful. I don’t really recommened this toy for small childen since there are a lot of small parts that could get lost easily. I can’t really say if this is fun to play with since I display it rather than play with it.

Also this is probably being nit-picky but I think the hooves look unrealistic.

Oy vey.

This post brought to you courtesy of Princess Sparkle Pony, who is funny and probably shouldn’t be condemned for bringing this to the world’s attention. The jury is still out on the person who posted a link to PSP’s blog in another blog, which I foolishly clicked upon.

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Filed under Adventures in the Intertubes, Child Abuse

Dan Savage: 1,015,872; Rick Frothy Fecal Matter: -34

Shorter Santorum: Waiter, I didn’t order this flabby, pallid … Hey! How’d my ass get on this platter?

Alternate Shorter Santorum: Are we sure those civilization-destroying pervs have 1st Am. rights?

By the way, if anyone knows Dan Savage, tell him it is way past time to fire up the website again. Thx!

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Filed under =MR, A break from the fail, Adventures in the Intertubes, WATB

ur porn. i don’t haz it.

Dear 9,999,999th person who wound up here because you were searching for:

  • Hot guy takes a shower;
  • hot guy taking a shower;
  • hot guy in the shower;
  • guy[s] taking a shower,
  • donkey guy in the shower (don’t tell me, don’t fucking tell me); or
  • any other iteration of good looking men taking baths (or pretending to for your amusement).

Sorry!

For future reference, skip any site with wordpress.com in the url. WP specifically forbids that sort of thing. Try adding ‘porn’ to your search terms. Or check the image results. Whatever, I really don’t care.

Now go take a shower. A cold one.

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Filed under Adventures in the Intertubes, Lazy Latte Sipping Islahomo

My boss is not an idiot

But Post-it Notes from my Idiot Boss makes me glad some people have idiots for bosses.

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Filed under A break from the fail, Adventures in the Intertubes

Palins attempt to trademark Yet Another Cock-up®

It’s been more than an hour, so it must be time for another Spudnut moment from the Blundah of the Tundrah®:

Palin family attorney Thomas Van Flein registered for a “Sarah Palin” trademark three days after the 2010 midterm elections. A “Bristol Palin” application was filed five days prior to the “Dancing With the Stars” Sept. 20 season premiere.

SPalin™ application.

BPalin™ application.

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Filed under Adventures in the Intertubes, Mental Health, ReaLAMErican Hero

H8rs’ Recycling Program – African-American Communist Traitors, Oh My!

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Filed under Adventures in the Intertubes, Church of the Poisoned Mind, Republicans and other Perverts