Nobody does it better

It’s hard out there for a LaRouchian. (LaRouchite? LaRouchistani?) It was not so long ago that we relied on them for our R.D.A. of full blown loony arsed gibberish spigots and spouters of conspiracy theories so deranged Mulder and the dudes of The Smoking Gun would perform a brilliant display of synchronized eye rolling disguised as a political party.

Oh, how times have changed.

But that doesn’t mean the LaRoons have lost their fire. They haven’t given up. They haven’t been assimilated into the TeaBorg.

They. Still. Have. Their. Chops.

Only the LaRouchel mind could have produced something that would allow me to write the following shorter.

Please ladies and gentlemen, I must have complete silence for this next trick.

Shorter LaRouche PAC Flyer I Found on the Train: We must remove President Obama from office because he took our spaceships so meteorites can kill everyone! Dead!

Yes! They’ve still got it!

I swear to the Babies Jesus, Mohammed and Guatama:

Ample evidence compiled by LaRouche PAC indicates that Barack Obama’s anti-NASA and anti-science policy is indeed criminal negligence which could potentially result in the extinction of the entire human species, warranting his removal from office under the authority of the 25th Amendment of the Constitution [It’s a special 25th Am. That only they can see -ed].

[…]

This policy is not meant to save money. It is meant to kill people. It is an explicitly anti-human policy, meant to reduce humans to nothing more than another animal confied to the face of the planet, buffeted by unknowable forces [Faaaart! -ed.], ultimately doomed to extinction — like every other animal.

[…]

In face of such potential, coinciding with the potential for terrible disaster, these long-term investments become more clearly a matter of human evolution or extinction. It should be clear from all of this [Provided you have not been following your doctor’s and/or probation officer’s orders -ed.] that Obama must be removed immediately.

It does go on. If time and inclination allow I’ll get my scanner working and load the flyer. Or you can go to their website and find out how to listen in to their live webcast on 19 April.

But in the meantime if you hear about a guy being fatally bitten by a snake that somehow wound up in his sock drawer, you’ll know they got me.

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5 Comments

Filed under Everyone is the root of all evil except for me and my monkey, Mental Health

5 responses to “Nobody does it better

  1. No, wait! The Queen of England is no longer the greatest threat to humanity?

  2. B^4

    Don’t you go disrespecting the Hoochie Coochie LaRouchie of my dreams. Yeah, she’s a crank, but I totally want to join her in a manned mission to Venus, if you know what I mean and I think that you do!

    • jscottg

      You want to take her to a place where she’ll burn up like a snowball in a blast furnace but you won’t be able to watch or hear it because the atmosphere is too thick?

      You’re one sick BBBB.