Halp! Halp! I’m bein’ po-ssessed!

Well, this is one way to prepare for the influx of Republican CongressCritters. Don’t think it’ll work though [via AssPress]:

Overwhelmed with requests for exorcists, U.S. Roman Catholic bishops are holding a special training workshop in Baltimore this weekend to teach clerics the esoteric rite, the Catholic News Service reported.

The church has signed up 56 bishops and 66 priests for the two-day workshop that began on Friday, seeking to boost the small group of just five or six American exorcists that the church currently has on its books.

Don’t ask me why. I’m too busy being pissed I can’t get up to cHarm City this weekend to re-enact scenes from The Exorcist.

OK, actually this makes me a tad nervous. Who are all these people who believe demons can hop into your body, where did they come from and how can we make sure they don’t get their hands on any guns, knives or sporks?

And has anyone seen Rick Sanctum Santorum lately?

Possible signs of demonic possession include scratching, cutting, biting of the skin; profound displays of strength [The fact these are also signs an altar boy is sick of Father Creep and his ‘Find the Communion Wafer’ game are sheer coincidence -ed.]; and a strong or violent reaction to holy water [Maybe stop using your wee-wee as an aspergillum. Just a suggestion -ed.].

Advertisements

Comments Off on Halp! Halp! I’m bein’ po-ssessed!

Filed under Church of the Poisoned Mind, Mental Health

Comments are closed.