Man mistakenly reads crap headline

Just like: Kids mistakenly drink wiper fluid at Ark. day care

Ten children at an Arkansas day-care center drank windshield wiper fluid after the owner served it from a container mistaken for Kool-Aid and placed in a refrigerator, authorities said Friday [emphasis mine].

Dear AssPress: Please explain how this the kids’ mistake. If you give a bunch of 2 – 7 year olds blue stuff in cups, they’re going to drink it. Should they have asked to see the bottle? Perhaps you just suck at writing headlines.

Perhaps everyone sucks:

[Laura James, a pediatric pharmacologist and toxicologist at Arkansas Children’s Hospital in Little Rock] warned that many antifreeze or windshield wiper solutions have bright colors, which can be mistaken for fruit drinks.

“I think the take-home message is not to have these products in the kitchen or where you’re doing any kind of food preparation.”

Uh. No.

I’m not that familiar with what little kids drink these days, but I am familiar with windshield wiper fluid bottles. Not only are they clearly labled, but they have that bottle shape and safety cap that is common to carrying things we do not drink. Ever. Like bleach. The take home lesson here is if you’re so damn dim and illiterate you can’t tell the two apart, you shouldn’t be left alone with kids.


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